Revelations

From Friday at noon through late this Sunday evening, my weekend as Miss Minnesota was jam-packed with events—literally every minute when you include the travel time—but unlike other blogs I have shared, this blog is not going to be filled with all of the fine details from my events at the Muscular Dystrophy walk, the Miss Mankato pageant, and the Night of Inspiration in St. Peters, MN. Rather, I am going to take this opportunity to bear my soul to give you a greater understanding of the woman I am today as a result of past adversity. This weekend, I performed and spoke at Compelled: The Road Less Traveled, a retreat to inspire youth to pursue excellence and the path of righteousness. It was in this venue, filled with talented musicians and encouraging testimonies, that I revealed the depths of my inner most struggles and the strength that has carried me through to minister to many young people so they could experience their own revelation. Upon leaving this event, where I left more changed than I ever thought possible, I now feel ready to share my heart with you. While I have shared my personal testimony at a purity retreat prior to becoming Miss Minnesota and in several high schools, I have not shared my story with many individuals who I personally know. I guess I am finding that it takes more courage to speak face to face about this with people who I know really love and care about me than it does to share in a larger group setting where I can use my experience to inspire youth to be strong even in the midst of life’s most difficult moments. I know I certainly could have used someone being raw and real with me three years ago when I hit rock bottom.

I will begin by saying I am blessed…I always have been. With a family who has done nothing but support me to the utmost and beautiful gifts that God has bestowed on me, I really feel blessed. But there was a time in my life where I didn’t feel as blessed, though I can now reflect back on that period and know that everything happens for a reason and out of the worst the best can arise. That dark moment in life came three years ago when I was a victim of rape. This adversity dealt me a significant blow that I can’t even begin to describe. After this happened, I admittedly fell into a more destructive path having no self-worth or value and feeling completely used like a disgusting piece of trash. Fear prevented me from initially telling anyone, but I mustered the courage to tell my sister Kari who helped me tell my parents. If I hadn’t told her when I did, I can’t even imagine where I would be today. I may have never told anyone, which likely would have caused this secret to eat away at me and perhaps even lead me further down the path that so many youth find themselves on today-the path of self-destruction and regret. Instead, with an unshakable faith and immense love and support from my family and counseling, I slowly started to put my life back together and heal. But, it wasn’t until I dove in heart first with my platform where I was meeting inspiring people who had been nominated on whohasinspiredyou.com that I began to realize the blessing that could come from this horrible dark point in my life. After listening to story after story of seemingly awful situations, I realized that some of the most amazing people have gone through the worst of the worst but their strength and attitudes in overcoming their tragedy or adversity has allowed them to be so inspiring. These are the individuals, the real heroes among us, that allow others who are experiencing similar situations to begin to realize a sense of peace knowing that a light does exist at the end of some of the darkest tunnels--“If that person can get through it, I can too.”
I know that God does not want bad things to happen to us, but He allows them so we can grow closer to him and to use those situations for good- to be a light in the world and to those He has placed in our paths. Thus, it became clear to me that Inspiring America is what I must do with my life. This is MY experience…not an experience that I asked for, not an experience I would wish upon my worst enemy, but it is now mine, and it is my responsibility to use it to create hope and peace.
I have healed my pain by honoring and sharing the inspiring stories of our unsung heroes across Minnesota, and, almost three years later, I can truly say the Miss America Organization has changed my life. It has provided me this opportunity to use my crown as a symbol of America’s strength. I am stronger than I ever have been and I owe it to so many things: God’s healing grace, my family, my platform and this organization. I was given a great responsibility this year as Miss Minnesota and I am so grateful for this opportunity; I just never realized how much it would touch my heart and change me more on the inside than the outside.

So, that is my revelation. I feel a greater sense of healing even writing this, just as I felt that deeper sense of peace after the youth retreat this weekend. I really hope the students were changed in some small way, but I know that I benefited in a greater way than I bargained for. I left changed…every time I leave an appearance, I am changed, sometimes in small ways and sometimes in big ways…thank you, Miss America, for providing constant opportunities for change. If you are a contestant in this organization, buckle your seat belt because if you really go after it, you stand to gain so much more than just a crown. You stand to gain the greatest sense of fulfillment, peace, and beautiful revelations in life day after day. My advice, take the risks…be courageous in sharing who you are, be raw, be real…you won’t regret it! This weekend, I felt the Lord by my side starting at the retreat and going all the way through to the Night of Inspiration Concert in St. Peters on Sunday. I am ready to seize every opportunity to share my story and work on my platform to the largest degree possible, whatever that may be.
I encourage you to help me continue this network of inspiration and pay it forward to someone else. Whether that is volunteering, nominate your inspiring person, or just telling them that they inspire you, it is a small way to help us realize all the amazing things that are happening around us every day amidst the negative we see on TV. This Tuesday is Give to the Max day. If you feel you can contribute financially and give to a charity, go to givemn.org.

Thank you for allowing me to open my heart to you and reveal the person I am on the inside not just the outside.

Give To the Max

While at Miss Minnesota in June, I remember hearing about a tornado that had devastated the city of Wadena, MN. Being that I pass through Wadena every time I travel home to Detroit Lakes, I am quite familiar with the city’s landscape and can certainly attest to the fact that this tornado caused irreversible changes to the aesthetics of the town. But, the amazing thing is that this same irreversible change did not happen to the hearts of the Wadena citizens; in fact, I think it caused their hearts to grow larger. In these times of strife, the town has come together with remarkable strength to volunteer time to clean up debris while bringing the community back to some sense of normalcy. So, I was honored to do my part by hosting a Night of Inspiration Concert right there in Wadena this past Saturday to celebrate all of the good that is happening there. The concert took place at the Memorial Auditorium, which has the most stunning 9 foot Steinway grand piano…as you can probably imagine, this was a dream for me to play on and certainly for the other gifted piano players who shared their talent that evening! A 12 year old boy named Joey played Beethoven’s 3rd movement of the Moonlight Sonata. To give you an idea of how gifted this young man is, this was a piece I played when I was 16! Another Inspiring American named Irma Allen (who is over 90 years old!!) has taught piano for 70 YEARS inspiring students to love music. Irma performed at the concert and the piece she selected was the same one she played 71 years ago on the very same stage for her senior piano recital…all I can say is, WOW! It was such an enjoyable night, but also a night to remember that, in the words of Mayor Wayne Wolden, “in times of great despair there are many reasons to be thankful and to have hope.” What an honor it was to recognize Mayor Wolden as an Inspiring American for all the work he did to bring back the city after the tornado. Despite all of the turmoil the residents of this town have faced, I felt honored that over $800 was given to benefit the Children’s Miracle Network that night. The people of Wadena are truly a shining example of how life’s adversity has the power to create strength, connectedness, and an immense desire to serve and bless others in need. True to course, I left another concert being inspired and blessed beyond measure!

In addition to the concert, the last couple of weeks have also been filled with school visits, talent performances, fundraisers, and other cool events. Have I mentioned before how much I LOVE being Miss Minnesota!!

My school visit took me to Hudson High School (this is an appearance I have done every year I have served as a titleholder) where my sister, Kari, is a choir teacher. It is the students there who inspire me to come back year after year because of their heart and commitment to music. It is also such a thrill to see my sister, who served as Miss Minnesota 2001, live out her platform of music education every day as their director. It just goes to show how remarkable and life impacting the Miss America Organization is! The personal platform component of the Miss America Organization has defined the long-term career and service path that so many young women have taken in life over the past 20 years. And now, you add the incredible commitment that women around our nation are showing to the national partnership of the Children’s Miracle Network--as much as we’re helping to change lives through the money we diligently work to raise for CMN, our lives are being transformed as we develop a deeper and stronger commitment to service.

It has been an absolute joy for me to work tirelessly to raise money for CMN through every Inspiring America event, and I had another great experience in Perham putting on a fundraiser dinner/performance at their golf club. Over the course of four hours, I performed, presented and socialized with over 180 guests. Can you believe I sold 50“Blessed Beyond Measure” CD’s that night? By the end of the night, we had raised more than $500 for CMN! Thank you, thank you, thank you to all of the generous people across Minnesota who have given to this worthy cause!! I continue to be humbled by the generosity of the people of Minnesota!

Speaking of being humbled, every time I do an event for Gillette Children’s Hospital I walk away changed. The most recent event I participated in was a fundraiser called “Shop and Sip” at CSM in Minneapolis. My duties were simple, meet and greet people and draw raffle winners, but these fun appearances are so awesome because they showcase the great support people have for Gillette. (And, it certainly doesn’t hurt when their donated money for CMN goes towards raffle tickets for great drawings and prizes!)




During my first four and a half months of service, I have traveled from one end of the state to the other and one side to the other. With one-third of my reign over, I have learned from every appearance and every person I have met that life is too short to not give…to give of ourselves in whatever way God has blessed us with, be it our talents, our time, or our money. I recently had the great opportunity to be a part of a promotional video for “Give to the Max Day,” which will occur on November 16th (the video will be forthcoming). This day presents the perfect opportunity for each one of us to take part in the Nation’s largest giving day blessing hundreds of charities. I encourage you to go to givemn.org on November 16th and donate to your favorite charity. Even by donating a simple $10 you can be a part of this great day that has already raised over $19,000,000 for charities! And, if you can’t give monetarily, create your own version of “Give to the Max Day” by volunteering your time to one of the many organizations in need. With the holiday season fast approaching, this is our opportunity to look for even more opportunities to inspire and bless those around us. You just never know how monumental of an impact your small sacrifice can have.

Be blessed!
Kathryn Knuttila
Miss Minnesota 2010